Debby Does…

I think it’s safe to say that, regardless of your politics, the world is a shit show and it’s stressful, even if you try to tune it out.

I remember that post-9/11 my husband and I were seeking solace in a world that had becoming terrifying overnight. Laugh, if you will, but we found it in “The Love Boat.” Predictable, ridiculous, and a bit mind numbing, we watched it for weeks on end, avoiding reality and sadness for an hour each night.

My soul is pretty restless some days, so I thought I needed to think about indulging in the things that soothe.

Certain kinds of television have offered me that type of comfort and sanctuary from the time I was a wee girl. I was drawn to those who were quiet and kind with voices that settled into my body, smoothing over the anxious bits. Mr. Rogers, Bob Ross had those voices for me. They lulled me into a restful state, making my worries fade away. They still do.

Maybe an odd addition to that television list is “The Lawrence Welk Show.” My mother detested it, but my fascination with it has lasted a lifetime. Talk about an escape from reality! Lime green chiffon dresses and tuxedos swirled by while singers with the whitest teeth I’ve ever seen sang insipid arrangements of songs that made old white people tap their toes. Every once in a while, on a Saturday night, I revisit it, still mesmerized by the spectacle of it all.

Fast forward many years and I’m deep into cooking shows. I love to watch people do what they do at a high level. I also love to cook and think about cooking. It makes me remember that the sun will rise tomorrow and we’re going to have to eat!

Truth be told, I haven’t watched news since the day of the election and won’t ever again. I see some headlines from the New York Times before I play my daily games and have taken to listening to “Up First” on NPR in the morning as I wash my night before’s martini glass. “Up First” is just enough for me and it’s presented in a calm and simple manner. That is good. I need calm and simple.

Once “Up First” ends, my Spotify tends to pick for me. Sometimes it’s very wise and goes directly to “Splendid Table,” which is my favorite show on NPR. (A more liberal, nerdy sentence has never been uttered.) “Splendid Table” offers opportunities to learn and consider what to try next, but also answers burning questions like, “Can I just use whole milk to liquify Greek yogurt if I can’t find buttermilk?” or “Why did my pavlova not set up properly, even though it wasn’t an overcast day?”

Warm yeast, rolling out dough, watching things rise, smelling the acidic scent of vinegar, watching oil shimmer, the sizzle of sautéeing mushrooms and shallots…this is my religion. Start all things in the kitchen with the best intentions, rely on the time honored, stained, and tattered recipes, use all good things, and you’ll find yourself in what you’ve made. I’m not sure this paragraph belongs here, but I wrote it with love. Peace happens in my kitchen.

I’ve also changed up the kinds of things that I read before bed. I found a section in my local bookstore labeled “Cozy Mysteries” and it’s a vibe! I’m currently snuggling up with “A Shady Hollow Mystery Series” starring Vera Vixen, a well dressed fox and star newspaper reporter. Even though mysteries are being solved, reality is nowhere to be found. Plus, the personification of animals is never wrong in my world.

From the time I was little, I found great comfort in stroking the inside of my arm. I’ve often noticed people watching me do it and wondering what the heck was going on. For me, it is an instant soothing feeling. I’m not embarrassed by it. Instead, it makes everything better, costs me nothing, and has no calories! Self care before I understood the concept.

We’ve created a wonderful backyard spot full of busy bird feeders and songbird melodies. I don’t know that there is a limit on how much time I could spend watching these amazing little creatures go about their lives. With spring well in bloom, they are gathering bits of straw and sticks to build their nests, oblivious to the drama of the stock market and tariffs. They are an excellent reminder that life goes on—life and death come and we have to be ready to do all of the things between them.

I don’t know what you do to soothe your restless soul, but I do know that we all need it. I’m no expert, but I’m up for the trial and error of it all. Share your ideas with me! I’m willing to go out of my comfort zone for most things that don’t involve heights, snakes, or tomatoes.

You know what else works? Spending time with this angel.